No, I am not pregnant. Yet.
But I am here to just spill the words and feelings into a blog post today…
When are you ready to have your first child?
And your second?
And your third?
These answers will be different for everyone and I try my best to answer them most days. I went through the newly married days of “When are you having a baby?” and my answer was always the same… “When we are ready”. In our situation, MC was ready before me and we made the mutual decision and were blessed to be pregnant very soon afterwards. I had always said that I had a two year plan once we were married, but things changed and 18 months into our marriage, our little SJ was born and I wouldn’t have it any other way.
And our second?
Well, that was also relatively easy because SJ was a confident, mature and very independent little girl. At just 18 months, we were confident that making her a big sister was a good idea and once again we were blessed to be pregnant. By the time, EN was born, SJ was already two – she had started and settled at a lovely school in the mornings, she was staring to potty train, she had given up her bottles and formula and she was sleeping in a big girl bed. She was also old enough to understand this new real-life doll and accept her and be loving towards her. They are now the best of friends.
But the third?
This is a tough one for me.
EN is a very different little girl – she is clingy and needy in the cutest way, she still has bottles, shows zero signs of being potty trained, hates her big girl bed most nights and does not like to share or be gentle. But there are also so many other factors, how do we fit another car seat into my car? Who juggles two kiddies if I struggle through terrible morning sickness again? Who lifts my precious girls when I cannot drive for six post-surgery? How do I cope with three littles when MC is out of town? How does my new business survive through “maternity” leave?
I have to be honest – I don’t think there is ever a ‘right’ time or a perfect time. And we are truly blessed that we have two little miracles – and we remember this through so many infertility stories, through the possibility of our third time round not being so easy and through two previous miscarriages that could so easily happen again.
In saying that, we said that we would love to try and get pregnant this year and through our faith, we shall wait and see what Jesus has in store for us and our family.
How did you know you were ready for babies? Second, third or fourth?