One way to look forward to a Monday, linking up with Becky
Week 10: 10 Survival Tips To the Expecting Mom
I have only been a mom for 16 months, and obviously pregnant for 37 weeks before then so I am no expert. But I don’t think that survival tips necessarily come from an expert, but rather someone that has experienced or “survived” these situations…
1. Hear but don’t always listen. I don’t know what it is about pregnant fairies and new mamas but they have a lot to say. They have so many opinions, tips and advice that they are so willing to throw at you and it is scary. And annoying. One will tell you something and another will tell you the complete opposite. My tip is to hear what they have to say and acknowledge them in the nicest possible way but you don’t always have to listen and take it to heart.
2. Trust your instinct. I formly believe that a mother’s instinct is ALWAYS right. The saying: “mom knows best” is very true (dads know a lot too!) and don’t ever forget it! Don’t underestimate the power of a gut feeling or a mother’s intuition. Again, hear people out but if you disagree, then don’t question what you think or feel. You will almost always regret not listening to the little fairy on your shoulder.
3. Pregnancy and birth are not glamourous. Don’t always believe the movies and celebrities (there is a reason Kim K is still in hiding and we didn’t see Kate M for her last month of pregnancy)… Pregnancy is not glamorous or easy – there are crazy hormones, pimple breakouts, loss of hair, increased emotions, swollen feet, water retention, intense cravings, extreme weight gain, burning indigestion, back ache, pelvic pain and so much more. Those 9 months are not for sissies. Birth ain’t glam either – hours of pain, injections and pain killers, screams and shouts, more pain, splits and tears, cuts and bruises, and lots of blood. Lots.
4. Stay open minded. Along with the many opinions, are plenty fears too. Some ladies will drum it into you that natural birth is the only way, big babies will split you, breast is best, you will never sleep again. Stay open minded and be prepared for everything. Allow yourself to be happy and comfortable with all available options. Get your head around natural and c-section birth, accept that you may not be able to breastfeed and have formula available, try different bottles or dummies (babies can be fussy) and sleep when you feel you can and need it.
5. Every child is different. It is always great to have a good support structure of other moms and to be able to chat together and share notes. But don’t compare. Children are all so different and they almost never do things or achieve milestones at the same time. Comparisons will only freak you out – but I promise that your child will walk and talk and eat and sleep at some stage. They definitely will.
6. Love their daddy. This should have been tip #1 because it is the most important. Loving your child’s daddy is the best thing you could do for them. Love and adore him, make him feel wanted and needed but also appreciated. Keep him involved and ask for his help when you need it. Speak positively about him to your children and enhance the bond he shares with them. He will love you more for it, they will love him more for it and they will learn so much through your marriage/relationship.
7. Be prepared. But also be flexible. I am a very organised person so i started planning and sorting from the very beginning. But you can never be too prepared – wash and buy clothes, decorate nursery, pack your bags, purchase big items, apply to schools or play groups, cook and plan frozen meals, arrange all household duties whilst you are busy. Be prepared. But also allow for that organisation and preparation to be turned upside down. Anything can happen.
8. Start saving. We all know that babies and children are expensive. And they are a long term expense (at least 18-21 years, if not much longer!) so we can never be saving too much. Open a trust fund, a savings account or stash it under the cot mattress… Save! Save! Save! What are you saving for? Nappies, medical bills in the case of colic, reflux, allergies or serious illness, clothing in rapidly changing sizes, education, activities, family outings and holidays, and then one day college or university, cars and new homes and weddings and grandchildren. You just never stop saving and spending.
9. Take photographs. I promise you will regret it if you don’t. Be the pregnant fairy that takes weekly photos and documents weekly sizes, feelings and emotions (easy for a pregnant blogger). And then be that crazy mama that documents and snaps away at every opportunity. Take pictures of everything – all milestones, holidays, play dates, new facial expressions and mannerisms and special occasions. Time goes by so fast, and we forget so quickly and so easily. Remember to also get in front of the lens instead of always being the one behind it. Special memories and moments that are captured last a lifetime, and will be so exciting for them to look back on one day.
10. Enjoy every moment. As everyone will tell you, it all goes by so fast. They grow too quickly and before we know it, they are sitting, crawling, walking and achieving milestones. Don’t blink for too long but enjoy it all. Try and embrace every moment – the good far outweighs the bad and time spent with your little human is so incredible and so special. Make and enjoy happy and special memories.
These tips helped me so I hope they can help you too, even just a little…